Friday, May 11, 2012

Loser of the Week: Bristol Palin

This week's loser of the week is Bristol Palin. The daughter of Tea Party found and Alaskan gov, this woman has no redeeming qualities. She is spoiled, was caught on video drinking and smoking pot, and is a big old breeding lump. On top of that, her lazy, skanky ass is unable to lose the baby weight she acquired as a result of being a big old slut and unwed mother. I wouldn't be slamming her, except she had the audacity to clobber her hooves on dancing with the stars as those thunder thighs made mini-earthquakes.

Now she is saying that marriage should be between one man and one woman, and everyone needs a strong father. Bitch, the last time I checked your baby daddy was absentee and you HAD A CHILD OUT OF WEDLOCK!!!!

Anyway, this was the well written blog entry by the future scholar. I would suggest she invest in lucite shoes and swing from the nearest pole, but I want the sleazy men who frequent strip clubs to keep their lunch as well as well as their eye sight. And of course, I do not want that poor pole to break:

"While it’s great to listen to your kids’ ideas, there’s also a time when dads simply need to be dads. In this case, it would’ve been helpful for him to explain to Malia and Sasha that while her friends parents are no doubt lovely people, that’s not a reason to change thousands of years of thinking about marriage. Or that – as great as her friends may be – we know that in general kids do better growing up in a mother/father home. Ideally, fathers help shape their kids’ worldview.
In this situation, it was the other way around. I guess we can be glad that Malia and Sasha aren’t younger, or perhaps today’s press conference might have been about appointing Dora the Explorer as Attorney General because of her success in stopping Swiper the Fox.
Sometimes dads should lead their family in the right ways of thinking. In this case, it would’ve been nice if the President would’ve been an actual leader and helped shape their thoughts instead of merely reflecting what many teenagers think after one too many episodes of Glee."

I am a breeding lump, homophobe, and moron. Don't worry though, I know the Bible better than you do. PS. If you see that homeless man on the corner that whistled at me, tell him he's right, big booty girls do it better. And I am available in five after this photo. Bye Mom.

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