Monday, July 29, 2013

A Ghandi Blog

We all know them. Unfortunately the entertainment industry is chalk full of them. Yes, people who are troubled. Apparently all insurance does not cover therapy so here they are fucking with our time and energy. As in, if they put the energy into the drama onstage that they did into real life they would all be winning Oscars. McSeriously.

I recently had a run in with a negative attention seeker. This young woman made my winter-spring very eventful to say the least. The current girlfriend of an ex of mine, who became literally obsessed with making my life a nightmare for God knows whatever reason. A lot of it has to do with the fact that this woman is unfortunately an alcoholic and a drug addict. I don't think she is sober for more than an hour a day. So basically she is very sick. In addition, she keeps a blog of sorts maintaining she had some sort of tough childhood with some sort of bizarre mother. Maybe she did. Maybe she didn't. A lot of it sounds like a mix of fabricated and a spoiled, entitled child blaming everyone but herself for her problems. Addict behavior if you will.

I have every right to hate this young woman. She has slandered me in public. Not only has she accused me of trying to cause problems with her and my ex (have not seen him in years and don't want to), but also has accused me of stalking her which is freaking laughable. However, I will point out that she copied several lines of my writing and tried to submit them as her own. Not to mention everytime I put up a youtube video she followed suite. When I did a show at a venue she worked at, she ripped down my posters to ensure no one would show up. After that, she made a series of hang up calls to me and blocked her number. On one she called me a bitch and told me to stay away from her boyfriend. Oh, and when I went platinum blonde so did she. When I low lighted my hair she went dark as well. And then the best part is, when I released a book suddenly she announced plans to release a book. The bitch doesn't even write. I guess the best was when the Queen of the Chemically Dependents released a video where she and her friends were beating the head in of a girl named April who was a "poser that had famous friends and a rich father." (Hmmmm, wonder where they got that complaint).

There is a part of me that wanted to beat her head in. I will not lie. However those around me reminded me of how sick she was and to let her go.

Well Ms. Wannabe has struck again. In addition to claiming I have no career, which is laughable because the closest she will ever get to my TV credits is seeing them in her living room, she is claiming I am harassing her again. I have not seen this thing in months!!! I wouldn't know about this except my friends relayed the story. She fabricated this story about how I am a mean girl who is making her life miserable. Oh and she also says I tormented her about her past. I did no such thing. She's insane. She's the one who was harassing me and wouldn't stop. This bitch is twisted.

However, on another level these days I am not so angry at her. Actually I feel terribly for her. She is a drug addict and an alcoholic. Her life is very small and very lonely. She is in a relationship with someone who is either enabling her or refuses to acknowledge she needs serious help. That lifestyle is not kind to women. The only road ahead of her is one of pain and suffering. Everytime I get an update on her she is either getting in trouble for drinking again, or whenever I am forced to look at her picture, she is bloated as hell.

While those around me tell me I should be flattered she copies me, it makes me cringe because it is a testament to how truly mentally ill she is. My life has not been easy. Yeah, I have made some career headway but I have paid dearly for being myself. While this is true, April Brucker is the only person I can be. I cannot be Mae West, I cannot be Marilyn Monroe, and I cannot be Madonna. Hell it would be nice to be Cyndi Lauper. But I am myself. We all have our own gifts. Trying to have someone else's is just desperate and pitiful. Not to mention I will admit, Ms. Wannabe is the better singer. She's can't write her way out of a paper bag but she can sing. But that's her gift. Shame on her for not running with it.

Seeing someone you hate look worse and worse should make you happy. Seeing someone you hate fall down the rabbit hole should make you happy. However, this doesn't make me happy. This makes me pity her even more. I know first hand how damaging addiction can be. I have had friends who died as a result of drug use, all wonderful and bright people buried with their boots on. I know the loneliness of being with someone who doesn't want to see you well and to be trapped in a codependent cycle. For as much as I hate what she is doing, I actually don't hate the person. My heart goes out to her on so many levels.

I guess my hope is that she finds a way out of the black hole she is in, where the nightmarish lies she tells herself is safer than the harmless truth of the outside world. I also hope God protects others from her lashing out, but most importantly, her from herself.

I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl

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