Monday, July 8, 2013

A Real Convo

As many of you know I am active in politics. Anyway, I have done some canvassing for Yetta Kurland despite the fact it screws with my serenity. Still, it means getting my candidate on the ballot. Anyway, I was walking along going to meet someone to talk about a project. So I am walking along and I see this woman bruskly walking. I was like oh, a canvasser. I will help her out. I will be a good person.


Canvasser: Are you a registered Democrat?

Me: Yes.

Canvasser: Would you like to sign to get your candidate on the ballot?

Me: Sure. Who is your candidate?

Canvasser: Corey Johnson.

Me: Oh, I am on Yetta's campaign.

Canvasser: Oh then you can't sign. Your signature on Corey's petition will cancel your signature on Yetta's petition.

Okay, this lady is cukoo cause that is not I was told but whatever. I made a mistake

Me: May the best man win! And if Corey wins I will get behind him because he is still a decent Democrat.

Canvasser: Well Corey has been on the board for eight years! He is the best man!

Me: Okay, I believe you. But I will say this. I got behind Yetta because she is behind women. Corey Johnson has not once mentioned women. Female is my political identity.

I got to walk away. I have now engaged the whacko. Goddamn having strong opinions

Canvasser: Corey Johnson cares about women. He is close to his mother and she is a woman!

WOW, is this argument for realz? I decide to take a joke

Me: Well I would hope so otherwise I would have some serious questions.

Canvasser: Well Corey wants to bring back the flavor in the neighborhood. It used to be cheap and manageable to live here. Now it's impossible to afford to live here. It is missing the old flavor!

Me: The crime rate was also higher

Canvasser: Yes but now you can't afford to live here. The working people are being pushed out of Manhattan.

Me: But I can walk down the street without being mugged.

Canvasser: But Corey wants to help the homeless and mentally ill. He wants to reopen mental institutions to cure the social ills (insert blah, blah, blah because she is just a moron).

Me: Thank you. I have to go. Give me some literature on Corey.

Canvasser: Sure. I would vote for him but I don't live in the district.

WHAT! WHATEVER. Doesn't look like I will be voting for Corey Johnson. He's got some of the craziest, rudest, idiots on his campaign. Sigh McSigh Sigh

I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
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