My twenties have been an adventure so far. Twenty was a neat year, the comedy clubs and rooms of New York City became my playground. Twenty one sucked, I was in an abusive relationship with a rageaholic. Twenty two was a big pAArtying year, that ended with me giving that up. Twenty three was a big year of movement and lessons, I made my first big TV appearance on Rachael Ray, got myself in some trouble, and dated a pathological liar for six months. Twenty four sucked; I was broke, poor, miserable, but got really good as a comedian and puppeteer. Twenty five was a sort of let go or be dragged, desperate and not needing to get where I needed to go I began to create my own thing. Twenty six was a pretty awesome year, my puppet children and I were on TLC and did a press tour and I became a talking head for a website. Twenty seven saw the release of my book and it being featured on Britney Spears's website.
What will twenty eight bring? I am starting to do well with my life and am not ashamed. My book is sold out on Amazon and I have to get them to restock. My puppet children and I are happy. I have my poppy seeds. I have self-esteem. Some part of me still feels inadequate like I should be farther along with my career. Like I should have millions of dollars. Like I am just some freaking failure. Like I am a Peter Panette who is unmarried and there are no children in her forseeable future that aren't puppets or fans that write her letters.
On the other hand I feel pretty amazing. My book is starting to sell, and people are reading it and liking it. I am pitching it to book sellers and have two magazines fixing to interview me. I also have a radio appearance coming up and am set to be a part of a monthly show. I am trying to get my music on FM Radio. I have fans writing me letter, making me posters, writing me songs, flying in to see me. Not to mention that those who have come across me today have sought me out for my wisdom. It has been pretty trippy actually. Me, wisdom, balance? While I am a Libra I have more of the wishy, washy, snap decision and the self-righteous temper that go with my sign.
As I get my footing, I am scared that this will slip away sometimes. That people won't buy my book, that this folly has been a waste of my time and energy. Then I remember what my twenty eight years on this planet have taught me. If there is anything one can do it is to be of love and service. It is to do the next right thing. It is to get the product you are selling out there in the world. It is to dream the big dreams. It is to, no matter how scary, never to be afraid.
At this point in my life I have people who for some reason look up to me. Ha ha on them, just kidding. However, such a station makes me wonder about the kind of influence I am. Am I a good witch or a bad witch? For as much as I like to doubt myself, because women are taught to do that, I know the universe gives me other clues whether people surprise me by telling me about the purchase of my book, my book is featured on Britney's website, or I get a fan letter that makes my eyes water. Bottom line, ten years ago I was only dreaming of moving to the city as a kid in Pittsburgh. I was auditioning for NYU. I never thought I would get in but I did.
The reason I called this blog the book of life is because on Yom Kippur, today, the Jews have this thing called the book of life that they apparently write in. They write something for each year I believe such as goals, etc. My goals are to be a strong, successful woman of influence. To operate from a place of love and tolerance, and to be an inspiration to those I meet.
Hope you enjoyed my blog. Love, April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl