I kind of went out on a date a while ago. It was fun and crazy. I don't do it often. Between my schedule, awkward shyness, and distrust of men it hardly ever happens. Actually, I am becoming less distrustful. I have been through a lot. However, it doesn't define me. Still, my makes me see the worst in people off the bat.
This dude and I started as friends and things progressed. A little voice in my head saw this was a bad idea. Still, it had been a long, terrible winter. We went out. We had fun. He was a complete gentlemen. The only time I have seen this is when guys have either gotten out of jail or have an ulterior motive. Very rarely are they true gentlemen. He spent money on me he didn't have. This was reminiscent of an ex of mine who was a pathological liar and had a Mr. Ripley complex. It felt weird. Did he rob it from an old woman?
I hate it to begin with when a man pays for me. It makes me feel strange. It makes me feel like he wants to be paid too. It doesn't feel like a treat but rather a gun to my head. I know the game.
Well people around me warned me he had an ulterior motive because he wasn't a citizen. I didn't want to believe it. However, as time went on I did. For starters, he wanted to be my boyfriend right away which is a bad sign. Whenever someone wants to rush you into a relationship, it means they are not looking for their next lover but next victim. He also wanted me to hang out in his neighborhood, probably to show off as a trophy to his friends. I also went to his facebook page. I have never seen someone post pictures and tell so many American women that he loves them. WOW! Oh, and then at the same time he was going back and fourth having a salacious conversation with a girl from his home village.
I never took him seriously. The age gap was significant. Rather, I had been a friend to him when a lot of people weren't. I treated him like a person and a lot of people don't. What makes me angry is my friendship was sincere with no motive, and he thought he could use me for his own gain. Yeah, I get it. You want to be a citizen. I get it, the laws aren't fair. My assistant just got his papers. But to use someone that was kind to you? To think I was stupid enough that you could snow me? To have an ulterior motive, and that was the only reason you were ever friends with me? When I gave him the heave ho he posted this thing on his timeline that said, "Those who don't believe in magic never find it." Yeah, blame your devious notion on me. Have a little bitch fit, Sir.
For a minute I regretted treating him like a person. I always treat people like people no matter who they are or where I meet them. Most of the time it pays off. They treat me kindly back. I am friends with my deli people, my cart dude, my grocery store folks, my super, etc. I treat people with dignity in respect no matter what position they have and no matter how much or little money might be in their name. This is why this was like a stab in the back and a knife to the gut. So maybe I should stop treating people like people, right?
No. All people should be treated like people. And then there are some who will view your kindness as weakness. This happens no matter what a person's race, age, gender, class, or station in life. He was an idiot and user. I don't regret being kind because I can look at myself in the mirror. He uses women for his own gain, and will always have to look behind his back for as long as he lives. Thank God he didn't become my boyfriend. He would have been showing up unannounced at my house demanding I feed him. Or worse, he was probably going to try to weasel his way into my life. The cherry on top of the cake would have been if I got a hate note from one of his little tricks he was leading on. He believes in magic, remember?
I still feel the sting of being used. However, that will fade. Especially when he is stuck playing the same games over and over again. Or maybe the village tartlet will come to his rescue. She can cook, clean, ride a donkey, and she will believe every lie that comes out of his mouth. I will continue to treat everyone I meet with dignity and respect, but rest assured I am never making that mistake with him again.
So he's a user, a loser, a douche bag.....Or how about a Suavecito. That's one word he will understand.
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
www.aprilbrucker.com
This dude and I started as friends and things progressed. A little voice in my head saw this was a bad idea. Still, it had been a long, terrible winter. We went out. We had fun. He was a complete gentlemen. The only time I have seen this is when guys have either gotten out of jail or have an ulterior motive. Very rarely are they true gentlemen. He spent money on me he didn't have. This was reminiscent of an ex of mine who was a pathological liar and had a Mr. Ripley complex. It felt weird. Did he rob it from an old woman?
I hate it to begin with when a man pays for me. It makes me feel strange. It makes me feel like he wants to be paid too. It doesn't feel like a treat but rather a gun to my head. I know the game.
Well people around me warned me he had an ulterior motive because he wasn't a citizen. I didn't want to believe it. However, as time went on I did. For starters, he wanted to be my boyfriend right away which is a bad sign. Whenever someone wants to rush you into a relationship, it means they are not looking for their next lover but next victim. He also wanted me to hang out in his neighborhood, probably to show off as a trophy to his friends. I also went to his facebook page. I have never seen someone post pictures and tell so many American women that he loves them. WOW! Oh, and then at the same time he was going back and fourth having a salacious conversation with a girl from his home village.
I never took him seriously. The age gap was significant. Rather, I had been a friend to him when a lot of people weren't. I treated him like a person and a lot of people don't. What makes me angry is my friendship was sincere with no motive, and he thought he could use me for his own gain. Yeah, I get it. You want to be a citizen. I get it, the laws aren't fair. My assistant just got his papers. But to use someone that was kind to you? To think I was stupid enough that you could snow me? To have an ulterior motive, and that was the only reason you were ever friends with me? When I gave him the heave ho he posted this thing on his timeline that said, "Those who don't believe in magic never find it." Yeah, blame your devious notion on me. Have a little bitch fit, Sir.
For a minute I regretted treating him like a person. I always treat people like people no matter who they are or where I meet them. Most of the time it pays off. They treat me kindly back. I am friends with my deli people, my cart dude, my grocery store folks, my super, etc. I treat people with dignity in respect no matter what position they have and no matter how much or little money might be in their name. This is why this was like a stab in the back and a knife to the gut. So maybe I should stop treating people like people, right?
No. All people should be treated like people. And then there are some who will view your kindness as weakness. This happens no matter what a person's race, age, gender, class, or station in life. He was an idiot and user. I don't regret being kind because I can look at myself in the mirror. He uses women for his own gain, and will always have to look behind his back for as long as he lives. Thank God he didn't become my boyfriend. He would have been showing up unannounced at my house demanding I feed him. Or worse, he was probably going to try to weasel his way into my life. The cherry on top of the cake would have been if I got a hate note from one of his little tricks he was leading on. He believes in magic, remember?
I still feel the sting of being used. However, that will fade. Especially when he is stuck playing the same games over and over again. Or maybe the village tartlet will come to his rescue. She can cook, clean, ride a donkey, and she will believe every lie that comes out of his mouth. I will continue to treat everyone I meet with dignity and respect, but rest assured I am never making that mistake with him again.
So he's a user, a loser, a douche bag.....Or how about a Suavecito. That's one word he will understand.
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
www.aprilbrucker.com
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