Monday, March 26, 2012

It's My Life (Talk Talk)

This past weekend has been friends, friends, friends. Friday it was Krissy time, Saturday it was Genevieve time and Sunday it was Fernando time. So when Monday came it was work time. I was to deliver a singing chicken telegram in Branchville, CT. Anyway Lynn was originally supposed to do it, another lady I work with who always sings big band up the street from me and who is totally awesome, couldn't do it because of a scheduling conflict. You see, the gig was originally on Sunday but it had to be moved.

Anyway, I got on the train and I knew I had to be there by noon, because the woman was set to leave at 12. So I got on the train and was chugging along like everything was fabulous, and then I even got on the connector train. It was going famously and then there was a natural disaster. A tree fell in the middle of the track and the train was stalled. A crew of four men with a chainsaw went to the track and began to cut the tree up so that our train could move. In all my years of riding the Metro North nothing like this has ever happened. The only thing I kept thinking was, "Shit! I am going to be late."

So I called the school I was to deliver to and informed them of the disaster. The secretary informed me she would try to detain her as long as possible. I was like cool. But I was hoping they would move a little faster with that chainsaw. I just didnt want the delivery to be a disaster. So then I called my boss and informed him it was a natural disaster and that I might be late. He told me to call the client. The client didnt pick up so I texted the client. Jon left the client a message. Jon just told me to sit tight, do my best, and to see what happens.

The conductor makes an announcement. He says then they are doing the trunk of the tree. WHAT!  They had been working for almost twenty minutes. How freaking big could this tree be!

Well anyway, ten minutes later we were on our way. The client and I finally talked. He said the school was up the hill. WHAT! Did they have streets in this town? Finally I get off the train and asked a girl with a nose ring in the coffee shop where the school was. She gave me excellent directions and off I went.

Over the river and through the woods, I crossed the bridge. I walked up the hill and to the front doors. There were screaming children, a sight that makes me smile and makes me worry about my choice in men. Anyway, I go to the front door of the school and it's locked. I am like, "Oh shit!" Then I remember it's the law. While I am a weird lady in a chicken costume. They don't know if I am a weird lady in a chicken costume who is in a registry somewhere. While I am not, it is better to be safe than sorry.

I call the contact. She lets me in and I change. The lady I am singing to walks in the office and she is amazing. The whole experience is amazing. The people who work at this office are amazing. THEY LOVE IT! Somehow, despite the fact that I smell like train stink, I pull it off.

Then that is not the end of the tale but only the beginning. Enter the principal. He is cute, sort of shy, and very sweet. He loves the fact I am a chicken and takes many photos of me. We get to chit chattin about life and it turns out that he has backpacked across the US. He likes Colorado. He also stayed in Times Square. He is from the Australian Outback. We are chit chatting, losing track of time. Of course he has lots of things to do but I feel a connect. I check his finger, no wedding ring. But he has two kids. Maybe he left the ring at home, or maybe not.


Anyway, we are chatting and I don't want to stay too long because these people have work to do. On the other hand, I do want to talk to him some more. Yes, Prinicpal Pal. So I leave him my info cause he asks for it and then I am off.

As I am down the hill I see the school on my caller ID. The principal called to see if I needed a ride! AWESOME! Hmmmm........Well I was already at the train. He mentioned me mailed the photo we took of me at his desk. I was like cool, talk to you later. Hot for teacher. Scratch that, hot for prinicpal. Lucky I didnt go to that school cause I would always be in trouble.

Anyway, I call my boss to let him know the delivery was a success and we have a laugh about the events of the day. Did I mention my boss is the man? My boss teased me about the way I say "natural disaster." He also mentioned he will be in NYC in April. My month. Can you say breakfast/brunch date? And he said that I looked so beautiful the last time he saw me. I would have gotten carried away except my boss is gay.

But this is just one of my many adventures. Last week I was part of a fundraiser for the Tom Findland Foundation (a gay organization to preserve erotic art and educate about HIV/AIDS), then there was the big letter I wrote asking for sponsorship, and in between that I made an angry youtube video or two. By the way, my mom says no more angry youtube videos :(. Apparently she doesnt like those.

Either way it is potluck time tonight. It is cross dress theme. I will be the most handsome boi there. Oh I so hope I see/hear from that Principal again.
Love, April

At the principal's office. My punishment for too much clucking.

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