What is a Veteran?

What is a veteran? We see the commercials with guys in uniform and think, oh the benefits they get are sweet. They march in a lot of parades, and then some talk about the war and are so old that they lose track of the stories. Sometimes we even think of the crazy man up the street posed on his front porch with a rifle in case of foreign attack. Other times we think of a family member and memories of an aunt or uncle flying a flag to wish them luck overseas and a safe return. More ofteh than not they are lost in translation and definition and we think, "Oh, do I get the day off work? Yipee!"

The American GI has always been there. From the beginning of America, since we have gotten our independence we have made ourselves clear. We are a force to be reckoned with. Even after the Civil War, when Maximillion violated the Monroe Doctorine, both Union and former Confederates fought together to give Mexico it's dignity once again. It was because we are America. We rode on San Juan Hill, victorious against Spain and gaining Guam and Puerto Rico under the red, white, and blue. We were there in World War I, fighting in Europe against the Kaiser and helping to end the monopoly of monarchy, letting the world know that the US was there. In World War II we heard cheers when the helpless people were liberated from concentration camps and then raised the flag in Iwojima in that memorable photo. We were there in Korea, to say no to Communism as well as Vietnam. We returned in the Persian Gulf against Saddam to say genocide was wrong. And now we are in Iraq and Afghanistan saying there is a better way, it is called peace and democracy.

When I think of an American GI I think of someone who serves their country and is grateful and humble as a result of their duty. I think of my grandfather, who was in the navy during World War II and told a story about riding the subway with the Japanese troops once to my brother during a report. My grandfather confessed that while it was a daunting trip the Americans respected their so called enemy. My grandfather remarked that while they lost, they didn't complain. If anything they respected those who conquered them and wanted to do everything possible to rebuild their cities shattered and were willing to work with the Americans to do so. My grandfather always maintained that no one wanted to drop the bomb, and those women and children are still in his prayers. Aside from being a veteran he is a fighter all around. A three time cancer survivor and also escaping from a near fatal car wreck, my grandfather is ninety four and still swims and plays tennis. Although not as mobile as he once was, since his eye surgery he is driving without glasses and stayed up to read my book in a single night.

I also think of my other grandfather, whom I never met because he died before I was born. He was a master machinist and was eager to serve his country, however they were slow to draft him because they needed his expertise in building weapons. My grandfather was a part of the troops who dropped the bomb. After the war, he was in Japan doing guard duty. He saw women and children eating out of garbage cans in a city devistated. Whenever he could, my grandfather gave them fresh food, proving while he was a so-called enemy, they were still innocent people. One kid he was on duty with, a hot head, shot and killed a little old vagrant because he believed the man was stealing. Fined a pack of cigarettes, my grandfather was disgusted that he got away with murder and decked him breaking his nose. While the kid never got time in jail my grandfather let him know that he had abused his duty, and that as an American soldier his job as to watch out for people, even the so called enemy.

The American soldier is a protector in a great many ways. My great uncle Gregory, a bit of a lunitic, had been a part of the forces that liberated those imprisoned in the concentration camp. He had heard the cheering from those deemed unfit whether they be Jews, gypsies, homosexuals, Slavs or anyone else. One thing my uncle hated was the Nazi's. He always said that their mission was nothing but pure evil and we lived in a world where no one had the right to decide who belonged and who didnt. While my uncle loved dirty jokes and loved to talk about shooting Nazi's, he had a low tolerance for hate and prejudice. He worked side by side peacefully with blacks before the dawn of Civil Rights. He had fought a war with them. Why not?

Colin Powell once wrote an article for Time Magazine about who the American GI was. During his peace he told a touching story about a Japanese businessman, who unfortunately was interned with his family during World War II. The kid, ripped from his home because of his race and afraid, was crying in a corner. An American soldier, taking pity on the child, gave him a Hershey Bar. Years later, the businessman made friends with Colin Powell and as a gesture of good will, the General gave him a Hershey bar and the man became teary eyed.

American soldiers are heros, protectors, fighters for the forces of good in a world of evil. They are brave, humble, and always ready to take on the next challenge. Unfortunately some of them are also another thing: forgotten.

Yes, forgotten. When Vietnam broke out, many of the kids drafted were only eighteen. Poor for the most part, they knew nothing about the place where they were destined to meet their end except that it was on the map, somewhere near Japan and China, and had a lot of jungle. When they were fighting a war that many feel we had no place in there were people who called them baby killers. There were people who booed them. They served their country and they got the stones of hatred thrown in their faces. In my opinion, as I have seen the legless vets begging for change over the years I believe that America as a whole should be ashamed of themselves.

My uncle had a brother Bernie who was a Vietnam vet. A drug addict who dated prostitutes, he was an easily punchline for myself and my cousins as he carried on with his antics whether it was running from an angry pimp or peeing in public. However my mother said, "It is important to have compassion for him. He saw some terrible things in Vietnam. Things no one is the same after seeing. Be kind to him, there are others in his same boat."

Bernie and the rest of the Vietnam generation teach us a painful lesson, soldiers are soldiers called to do a job. While sometimes as Americans we might not support the war, we must support them. To us they are heros risking their lives overseas. They are in places that are foreign with enemies who have nothing to lose. They deserve our prayers, compassion, respect, and gratitude. When they step off the plane they deserve a hero's welcome. They deserve a thank you.

But then I know a veteran friend of mine who does know how to say thank you and leads the way. His name is Dave Rosner. He is a Lieutenant Colonel in the Marines. He is a Jewish Marine which is quite unusual. Dave uses his unique mixture of identities to pursue a career as a standup comedian. Dividing his time between active duty, USO Shows, and a career in NYC he produces shows for veteran's hospitals. Some of the comedians have served while others like myself have not. Nonetheless we all walk away with tremendous respect for the men and women who have served our country. Whenever they served, wherever they served they are always first and foremost in our hearts. They also deserve a good laugh and comedy show like anyone else, and Dave knows that. Dave has also been a good friend, who got me to shop my book around in order to be published when I didn't know what the next step was. A regular talking head on TV, check out Dave's book Full Metal Foreskin about his adventures as a Jewish Marine.

Of course much like my friend Dave I have friends who have gone through officer training like Darren Joyce from my high school. A hockey player and champion boxer, he is using his expertise at math and his good heart not only to protect others but to lead heroically. While possessing a humble attitude outside the boxing ring, he is probably hell to reckon with on the battlefield. I am not complaining. He is a friend in real time and a fighter where it counts. I am thrilled he is in charge of protecting me. In his mix is Jeff Kohler and Bethany Kaufman, both graduates of Annapolis. Both hardworking on the field and off, they are also in officer training as we speak. Keeping America safe and taking our security to the next level. When they are on the job we can sleep, end of story.

I also see my friend Keith Godwin and his wife, a former Army bootcamp instructor making a difference in the community. Keith, a former Marine who used to guard the border between the Koreas, puts on comedy show at drug rehabs, hospitals, and churches. His service in the corps has shown him that the world is not that big. Why not? I always tease him about his wife kicking his butt, but a holy woman she is also a minister. Both use their talents for good and to spread laughter and hope. Both are the epitome of service.

In that mix I cannot forget my friend Rick Carino, a former navy man who once gave me a joke about going down under for a show for the armed forces. Rick is the poster boy for the can do attitude of the armed forces. Once I did a show of his in Connecticut and Rick did everything from fill the place to build the stage. I wondered how he had the wherewithall to carry on such a mission. Then I remembered when one lives under water for months at a time they can do anything. Rick also has a very postive attitude, one of perseverence. Once I was complaining and Rick told me to get over it and get a better attitude. He didn't validate my stupidity, true friends never do. Another time I was going through a rough patch, one that tested our friendship. I apologized and Rick told me it was water under the submarine and time to move on. It was time for the next mission. It was time to keep on going, the attitude that has kept America the land of the free and the home of the brave.

In time the face of the American GI is changing. The service academies are allowing women in. Male leaders have seen the big picture and female leaders zeroing in on the specifics and being passionate about the mission, a fluid mixture to make us even stronger in both war and peace. Also, the tyrranical Don't Ask Don't Tell has been lifted. This means the military now welcomes LGBTQ people eager to serve diligently who want nothing more than to protect this country and to help those who have been abused by dictators around the world. It means people like my friend Martin can not only march in tomorrow's parade, but can also be who he is while we salute him and thank him for his bravery and service.

Tomorrow we must thank all the brave men and women for their service. We must salute them. We must say thank you.

We must also pray for those like my former classmate Russell Kurtz who lost his life in Iraq. While his holiday is in May, he was still a part of the effort, a part of the solution to make this world a better place.

We must also remember that tomorrow is not a day off or another chance to sleep in. It is a chance to show our gratitute. It is a chance to remember that there are a lot of eighteen year old kids who lost their lives so that we can complain about the president, vote, and use our first amendment that we all freely throw around and thanklessly abuse. When we complain about how we don't like the president or the laws or whatever, we seem to forget those young men who fought in Europe, the Pacific, Korea, Vietnam, Iraq, Afghanistan. Now let's take a moment to remember how we got our rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Let's remember who fought overseas and gave us the strength as a whole to say that monarchs abusing power and a dictator deciding who was fit to be a part of the human race and who was not based or religion is wrong. Let us remember how they brought those lessons back because they fought together and now as a nation we say racism, sexism, and descrimination against LGBTQ people is wrong. By being brave they passed the gift on to us so we can use it day to day as Americans. So we can say yes we can, meet challenges, and make it through anything.

It is a chance to remember what a veteran is.

Love April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
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Come to my book signing Thursday November15
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Thoughts on Freedom

Red, white, and blue fly around but once a year. Houses are decorated in these colors, streaming and screaming Independence. Yes, Independence means different things to different people. For some it means running a road race whether it is the Brentwood Firecracker or the Sprint for Freedom. For others it means a cookout where everyone gets plastered. Then there are those who it means the return of a family member from Afghanistan. Sometimes, it means celebrating citizenship or an anniversary free from a demon that consumed one’s life.

Independence could also be my old middle school, a blue ribbon winning Junior High where I spent most of my awkward pre-teen years. I never felt the independence that the bald eagle who was our mascot preached, but rather bondage to parents, teachers, and social standards unfulfilled. I never felt pretty enough as a chubby girl with braces and horrendous makeup. Instead, I was the subject of taunts from a popular girl and her cronies. Another thing to make you a prisoner, your peer group.

The crazy thing was, in those chains I did find freedom. I found my skill as a writer, storyteller, ventriloquist, comedian, and television host. I loved what I was doing and didn’t care. Suddenly, those cronies couldn’t bring me down. I had broken the proverbial cuffs, links, and chains the world had bestowed upon me telling me what I should want as a young woman. Within that dungeon called growing up somehow I found freedom.

Of course the cronie who made fun of me became the ultimate follower. In high school someone called her fat, poetic justice for as mean as she had been to me. She lost a bunch of weight and had to go on psych meds which made her balloon up. In everyone of her facebook photos she is drunk and has a glazed over, sad look in her eyes. For as much as she wanted us all to believe she had it all under control she doesn’t. She is far from being free. She is in twenty three hour a day lockdown in the haunted house upstairs.

For the Fourth I went to my aunt’s house. I saw my baby cousins, now getting big. My cousin Joey had his first big year of freedom. This fall he starts as a sophomore at Case Western. One’s first year of freedom from Mom and Dad makes one realize there is a price for such a concept. Sure, my cousin has his own time, but if he doesn’t study he flunks out. If he is not fit he does not have a place on the football squad. If he does not comply he does not make the fraternity. However, he did well with football, the frat, and school. As a matter of fact he made the Dean’s List. He is doing well with his new found freedom.

My sister is also experiencing a new kind of freedom. She is auditioning for her rounds as a student doctor at Shadyside Hospital. Living in an apartment, she visits my parents when she can. But now she has the freedom to choose her own destiny. While matching is stressful, my sister knows she has the freedom to say yes or no, and to choose the place that is best for her to practice emergency room medicine. A Virgo who likes to be in charge, my sister will like the freedom of being the Grand Pouba. However, with great freedom does come great responsibility.

My cousin Kelsey and my birthday twin is a nurse. She was telling me that if a doc is a jerk the nurses have ways of fighting back. While it sounds crazy, it is refreshing to know this system of checks and balances exists in the American hospital in order to keep patients safe from the tyranny of doctors who believe they are dictators.

Looking around, I see the people at the party experiencing freedom to drink freely and eat as much fatty food as they want. I am eating lots of fatty food. I joke that they may have to roll me out of there. However, as the hot dogs my cousin Bobby cooks on the grill are shoved into our mouths along with the hamburgers, he mentions he is going to Vietnam as a part of his cruise where he works as a musician. My uncle says, “Years ago, when you said your kid was going to Vietnam everyone freaked. Now you tell them to take plenty of pictures.”

This is true. Unlike the heroes of other wars these men were treated like killers when they came home. Sometimes we give similar treatment to Iraqi soldiers. Scary as it is, Americans have forgotten to be grateful to the men and women who serve. Not only is it disrespectful, it is disheartening as I remember watching Gone with the Wind. The Civil War was father against son, brother against brother, and many of those guys were only eighteen when they met their end. Same with the young men in the jungles of Vietnam and in the sand pit of Afghanistan. They wave our flag and we flip them the bird by having no social programs for them. They fight for our freedom, we in turn make them prisoners.

As I chow down, my grandfather makes an appearance. He looks good despite his recent health struggles and being a part of this celebration is his first taste of freedom in sometime. Then I remember, he is going to be ninety four. He fought in Japan during World War II. Both my grandfathers did. My dad’s father, who died long before I was born, used to insist his children ate all their food because he had witnessed people picking food out of the garbage in Japan after the explosion of the atomic bomb. Then we realize how good we have it as compared to the rest of the world.

As a blogger, I spout off my opinions freely. In other parts of the world I would be arrested. Sure, there are dirty cops but there are lawyers who fight back and know the law and protect their clients. Maybe sometimes defendants have too many rights, but in other parts of the world you are guilty until proven innocent.

Then I talk to my brother later in the day who lives near Boston. The town is alive with Revolutionary War celebrations. I think of the gun powder and the young men who died at Lexington and Concord, minutemen unprepared to tackle the British Army. However, they didn’t care as they stormed that hill. They were sick of being oppressed and wanted freedom and were willing to die the death of a psychotic hero in order to do it. That is America.

Because of their bloodshed we have the right of freedom of speech and to occupy Wall Street. Because of these men and their brave sacrifice, we have the right to have elections every four years. It’s because they weren’t afraid and they kept fighting.

That’s what freedom is, not just the will to fly and do what you please but the courage to fight and to do it.

Happy Birthday America

Love,

April

Happy Veterans Day

As we all know today is Veterans Day. We celebrate those who served our country, died in the war or God forbid, went missing in action. To many of us the meaning is lost. The school kids look at this as a day off. For some districts this is when they do the parent teacher conferences and the kids hope they don’t get a bad report for all the shiteous behavior they normally engage in. Other kids catch up on trashy day time talk shows and cartoons. Teachers view it as a day off where they are free from all the screaming Susie’s and Jimmy’s and their equally more annoying errant parents. As for those who work in the banks, the post office or any other government sanctioned position they are sleeping in today counting their blessings that this is one day they have off that many others do not. I must say this is insulting to me as an American.

I have always vocally opposed the war in Iraq. There were no weapons of mass destruction and in the 1980s, we seem to forget, Reagan and Saddam Hussein were friends. However there was oil and money involved and that’s when things went south. Nevermind that unlike the rest of the Arab world, Saddam gave the people universal healthcare, the right to choose, the women were allowed to work, and basically it was a free democratic society. Yes he did kill those that opposed him but what do you call the Patriot Act? However much I opposed the war I will say one thing, I still always supported our troops.

I have several classmates who went to fight in the Middle East. Our local magistrate who was affiliated with the armed service was a military judge in Afghanistan for a tour during that time. The brother of one of my older brother’s former high school football team mates went over to fight in the Middle East. His family put the USMC flag in the front of their window next to the American flag waiting for their son to come home. We all thought George W. Bush was a dufus in my family. However, in church when we prayed for the troops this young man was always at the top of our prayer chain.

Another of my classmates, Russell Kurtz, died in action. Russ was a good guy who was liked by everyone who has the privilege of knowing him. He was a member of the football team, National Honor Society, and a few other clubs. Russ was one of those people who was always laughing and had those around him laughing as well. Despite the fact Russ had good grades he chose to join the military to go to Iraq because he had always wanted join since he was a kid. Though it was war time he didn’t complain, and according to those close to him the only thing he ever griped about was the food in boot camp. Russ was killed in action when his army jeep met with a planted bomb. I would never say my former classmate was a killer or that he died in vain for a useless war and a useless cause. Rather I would call him a hero who served his country who is remembered as he should be on this day.

Then again, Americans are apt to celebrate and remember only what they want to. Take the Vietnam War for example. Unlike the previous wars, none of these men received a hero’s welcome. As a matter of fact many of those guys who fought in one of the most violent wars America had ever encountered were ousted from society. Drafted to end Communism in a country who could never feasibly invade the United States, a draft was imposed. These guys, all the average age nineteen, couldn’t drink or vote but could die for their country. This was truly a rich man’s war and a poor man’s fight. Many of the rich stayed in college getting useless advanced degrees while the poor were forced to tough it out in the jungles watching their friends die and deal with boobie traps that included a net revealing a hungry Bangle Tiger as well as the ever present jungle rot.

What was even more criminal was that some of them became POW/MIA. I am not talking John McCain but Antonio R. Sandoval, Jr. He was eighteen years old from San Antonio, Texas when he went POW/MIA. My brother gave me his POW/MIA bracelet for my seventeenth birthday because it had occurred right after 9/11. My mother told me the goal was to wear the bracelet until he was returned. Sandoval was never returned as far as I know, but they think they found his bones a few years ago when the Cambodian government turned them over. While finally a part of him could go home, and for that reason it is important his memory is kept alive and his story is continually told.

Vietnam was something the American government should be ashamed of and the treatment of those veterans was equally as horrific. They had no assistance or jobs coming home. As I said earlier, it was a rich man’s war and a poor man’s fight. My dad remembers being a part of the draft lottery and lucking out by getting a high number. However he remembers seeing kids from his block go off to fight in the jungle and coming home in a body bag if they ever came home. One kid who had a crappy home life on my dad’s street even volunteered. Which brings me to another point, many of these guys don’t join the army because they want to fight. It might be to escape a craptacular home situation and this is a viable option that gives them healthcare and a possible career as well as a trade. After the war many of these guys suffered from PTSD as well as drug addiction much like my uncle’ brother who, after many years of going from crack house to crack house with his hooker girlfriend, is now is a nursing home. These men served their country and were shuffled aside like useless lawn flamingos. Should we not take a moment to honor them?

Both my grandfathers served in the Pacific Theatre in World War II. My dad’s dad, whom I never met, went to Japan after the war and told stories about children eating out of trash cans and would get angry when my dad and his siblings would waste food. Hate to say it, for as fucked up as America is we still have it better then the rest of the world, especially the places that we bomb. While dropping the atomic bomb did cost thousands of lives and left a generation of Japanese children suffering from leukemia, it was a move that spared thousands of American lives that would have been lost during a land invasion. Truman was between a rock and a hard place, and in a war there is no true solution that is fair.

My mom’s dad rarely talks about World War II but always says that the Americans respected the Japanese because when the bomb was dropped they went back to work rebuilding their cities. Today the Japanese are some of our strongest allies. Gone are the time of kamkazi pilots and Tojo with a chorus of Tokyo Rose. America makes mistakes too such as putting thousands of Japanese Americans in internment camps when there was not one traitor amongst them. However, while this day is a day to honor our heros today is also a day to remember those mistakes, seeing that we have one in Cuba right now called Guantanamo Bay.

Wars for as much blood shed as they have put forth have also gotten America to be the world super power that it was. In 1763 the British won the French and Indian War taking over a large chunk of North America making English the mother tongue. In 1785 we won our independence from the British making us the first country to have ever defeated this naval and world super power. In 1812 we let the British know we weren’t about to be recaptured and let them force our men to be sailors. (Today they are fabulous allies). In 1836 Texas won it’s independence from Mexico, and then in 1848 the United States kicked Mexico out of Texas, California and most of the Southwest giving us states that are very valuable to the structure for several reasons.  Of course 1865 brought an end to the American Civil War, which pitted brother against brother and not only kept this fledgling republic united but also abolished the inhuman practice of slavery. In 1898 Teddy Roosevelt and Company charged San Juan Hill ending Spanish occupation in North America, making most of Latin America independent, and not to mention giving us Puerto Rico and Guam which serve as military bases as well as fabulous vacation spots. Then in 1918 when World War I the supremacy of monarchy ended officially ended making the United States a world super power. Then in 1945 we helped our European friends whom now needed us to stop an evil tyrant named Adolf Hitler who, though he died, actually planned to invade the US. Yes, we should have been very afraid.

In honoring the veterans, we honor the achievement of men who for better or for worse, did the job of serving their country. I am an outspoken pro-choice advocate who favors gay marriage and universal health care. However, I remember there are men who died for my freedom of speech that I hold so dear and to spout out my opinions as I do without even being solicited. As I pen this entry, I remember these men died for my right to have this here blog. These men did not die in vain but rather with the hope the world could be a better place for the rest of us.

In celebrating Veterans Day we also celebrate our history for better or for worse, how far we have come and where we have yet to improve. In closing I say let gays serve in the military if they want. They are able bodied citizens who love their country and God. Just because someone is gay does not mean they wear a boa when they fire a rifle. Take both Alexander the Great and Richard the Lion Heart, both were as gay as the day is long and both were winning generals who won battles everywhere they went intimidating opponents. Remember that the next time you don’t want them to repeal Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.

With that being said, if you can take a few minutes to think of the men and women who served our country or continue to do so. They have done more for you than this blog could ever detail.

With that Happy Veterans Day. Love April